The birth of Max

So here’s the story…I was having a lovely and relaxing day on Friday, the 7th. It all started with a fantastic body massage in the neighbourhood and then I treated myself with a nice lunch at the Village Café. I got myself a nice trashy magazine (People – A Baby for Halle! Should I have read anything into that??) and enjoyed a yummy sandwich and salad. After the main course, I selected a dessert and kicked back with my magazine. I had read a lot about what it feels like when a person's water breaks and I have to say that it was much like what I had read about – a big whoosh. Needless to say, the big whoosh came right after dessert. In the restaurant. The lovely servers were great though - I got some napkins for my chair (woefully inadequate but it was a valiant effort) and called John. Then I jumped in the vehicle and headed home in VERY wet pants. John met me at home (after being found at work while down having tea with friends in the cafeteria – SO busted).

We called our midwives (the amazing Diane and Genevieve) and doula (the indispensable Gisele) and, after Diane stopped by to check me out, I was advised to sit tight as I was having no other signs of labour. I was also told that I had tested positive for Group B Strep and so would have to go in to the hospital to get some antibiotics. Normally, those could have been obtained on our own from a doctor, but given that the test results came in so late on a Friday, the only arrangement was to get them at the hospital. However, the antibiotics would only be administered once labour was on the horizon so, at the time, our visit to the hospital could have come that night or in the morning.

We puttered around the house for a while and made some calls. Then, we headed out for dinner at Swiss Chalet and a little grocery run to pick up snacks for labour. Finally, we packed our hospital bags and headed to bed. I had some minor contractions in the night from 11 pm to 3 am but nothing major. We checked in with the midwives again in the morning and they advised me to sleep if I could. So, I cashed that cheque and ended up sleeping until 10:45 am. That’s when John woke me up to let me know that he had spoken to Diane and that it was time to head to the hospital.

Once we got to the hospital, the midwives told us that I would need to be induced as it had been almost 24 hours since my water broke. I was admitted around 1 pm and hooked up to some monitors. They started the Pitocin (a synthetic version of Oxytocin, the hormone that a woman’s body naturally produces during active labour) at about 3 pm. I was then advised by the midwives that the labour might get a bit rough as a body doesn’t really like being told what to do. Yippee.

I won’t say it was rough but active labour (contractions every two minutes or so) came pretty fast and furious. By 5:30 or so, I was doing lots of breathing exercises to cope with the contractions. Given that Gisele was going to have to come in from out of town, I used my powers of foresight to deduce that I’d likely be needing her help in about an hour and gave her a call…

Gisele arrived shortly after 6 and Diane and Gen arrived shortly after that. I decided to hop in the Jacuzzi tub for pain relief but unfortunately there was no hot water! Yes, they shut the hot water off for two hours for repairs! Rather unfortunate but we dealt with it. Once the water came back on around 7:45, the tub was filled and I hopped in. I spent about an hour in the tub. In the words of my colleague Cecilia, “I’m no hero” so I asked for something else for the pain. The two options presented to me were some nitrous oxide (laughing gas) and an epidural. I was told that the epidural would take some time to arrange, as the anaesthetist would only arrive within an hour. While waiting for the guy to show up, I decided to take them up on the laughing gas, which would supposedly “take the edge off”. I’m not sure about the pain relieving power of the gas but it was definitely a sanity saver for me in other ways. The gas is self-administered so you put the mask on your face yourself when you are having a contraction. You breathe in and out of the mask all during the contraction then take it off between contractions. This gave me something to focus on and kept my breathing going.

When the anaesthetist finally arrived, Diane and Gen thought it would be a good idea for me to pee and get a quick exam before administering the epidural. However, when I came out of the bathroom, the anaesthetist was gone! Someone had gone into shock in the OR and he had been called away. I have to say that this was a bit of a low point for me. I hung in there with the support of my team, breathing over and over and over again through the mask.

Eventually, sometime after 11 pm, the anaesthetist showed up again. However, we decided that I was so close to pushing that I shouldn’t have the epidural (epidurals administered at this point in labour can really delay the process and prolong your pushing time in particular). Diane, Gen and Gisele let me know that although the contractions would continue in frequency and intensity, I could at least “use them” during the pushing stage for focusing and moving the whole process along.

At about 11:30, I started to push. It kind of started involuntarily and then I actively got into it because it was time to get the show on the road! Gen and Diane were amazing in terms of letting me know when to push and how to push to minimize the damage to my nether bits.

At 12:34 am, Max Julian Stardom was born! He was immediately placed on my chest. The crazy thing about newborn babies is that they enter this stage immediately after birth called the quiet alert stage where they stop crying, and seem to take in everything around them. Max’s eyes were wide open and he just looked around and took in the world. John and I really enjoyed this time with him. The great thing about the midwives is that they can delay all of the after birth stuff they need to do (newborn exam, eye ointment, weighing, etc.) to give you this time with your baby. We are so grateful. Funny note, though, after Max was placed on my chest, about a minute or two went by before anyone even checked if it was a boy or a girl!! Awesome.

The following two and half hours are a bit of a blur. There was a lot of paperwork to do plus the newborn exam. John skipped off to make some calls to family and friends while Max and I hung out some more. Gisele gave me some great nursing instructions and he had his first feeding. At 3:45 am, we bundled Max into his car seat (thanks SO much to Colin and Cathy for lending us their car seat – boo on our car seat still not being here!) and headed home. Other than some maniac who freaked us out by running a red light at Montreal Road and Ogilvie, the ride home was uneventful.

A lot of people have been surprised that we left the hospital right away and have asked us why. To put it simply, we thought we would be more comfortable at home. As it turns out, we were right: it was great to get home and snuggle with Max in our own bed. With midwifery care, the midwives visit you at home on Days 1, 3, and 5 so we knew we would be seeing the midwives in less than 12 hours. I was able to get in a good sleep and John got a little rest as well.

John was an absolute dynamo throughout the process. He was very supportive and wonderful. I think I almost crushed the bones in his hand a few times during the pushing but he took everything in stride.

I can’t say enough about our support team. Three sets of hands sounds like a lot but it was amazing to have all of this support and encouragement. These women are birth experts and it shows.

I’m sure we will relate more funny details and little tidbits in person but we thought we would post a “birth story” as a start.